The Joke File

Graeme Rhodes · **Posted:** Sun Dec 04, 2022 11:42 am

Hell no!!

BC · **Posted:** Wed Dec 21, 2022 6:20 am

The schedule has been released for next year’s Bledisloe Cup

At 6pm players will enter the field and line up either side of halfway.There will be a Welcome to Country and then they will take a knee for 1 minute.

After that there will be a minute’s silence for everybody who has died.

They will then sing the National Anthems .

They will then go to the middle of the ground where the All Blacks will perform the haka . After that players will go into their religious groups to sing and pay homage to their friends in the sky.

Atheists will go into their own group to talk about what they have done to combat climate change.

Both teams will then come together in the middle of the field and hold hands while putting rainbow tape on each others’ arms.

The Wallabies will be wearing their new strip designed by Lisa Wilkinson. It will have aboriginal artwork along with black, blue, white, red, pink and brown ribbons printed on the front of the jumper. The jumper will have a large Z on the front for the team’s new sponsor, clean energy billionaire Zali Steggall.

The Wallabies will be captained by Bill Smith as Joe Bloggs is still serving a 10 game suspension after it was discovered his great uncle made a feminist remark to a barmaid in 1965.

The game will also have 2 minute time-outs after a try is scored so mental coaches can enter the field and talk to the players who have just been scored against, to discuss their emotions.

Purple cards will also be used in the match for players to be sent from the field for 15 minutes if they say anything mean. The game should finish around 11.45pm.

As the stadium is powered by 2 wind turbines and rooftop solar panels if there is no wind or sun in the 2 days prior to the game, it will be moved to an afternoon game starting at 12.30pm.

Graeme Rhodes · **Posted:** Wed Dec 21, 2022 11:25 am

(someone's god or equivalent) will get you for this BC!!

Seejay · **Posted:** Thu Dec 22, 2022 6:49 am

So, so accurate it's scary! :badgrin:

Hippy Chippy · **Posted:** Fri Dec 23, 2022 3:00 pm

Seejay · **Posted:** Fri Dec 23, 2022 7:32 pm

Bastard...! :lol1:

Graeme Rhodes · **Posted:** Sat Dec 24, 2022 10:51 am

Maybe he's related to Victoria! (Keeps the secrets to himself)
..and yes that makes him a bastard Seejay.

Hippy Chippy · **Posted:** Fri Jan 20, 2023 1:25 pm

Seejay · **Posted:** Sun Jan 29, 2023 11:12 pm

A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked, "What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"

Her husband replied, "It's a war to stop America and NATO." "Oh, right” she says “How's it going?"

“Well” he replied “so far we have lost over 20 generals, 110,000 troops killed, countless injured, 3000 tanks, 300 aircraft, hundreds of helicopters, countless armoured vehicles, artillery and trucks, our flagship along with other naval ships, our army is being defeated in most areas and we have had to resort to conscription to replace our losses”.

“Wow” replied the wife “what about America and NATO”?

“They haven’t turned up yet”

BC · **Posted:** Mon Jan 30, 2023 6:09 am

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